The Edmondson Blog


Rules For Barbeques


We'll be entering the BBQ season in a few months. Therefore it is important to refresh our memories on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
  1. The woman buys the food.
  2. The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes pudding.
  3. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill, glass of fine wine in hand, chatting to other men on the subtleties and techniques of barbeques.
  4. The woman remains outside the compulsory three metre exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.
  5. THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
  6. The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
  7. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another bottle of wine while he flips the meat.
  8. THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
  9. The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
  10. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
  11. Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
  12. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed her night off and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women!

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