The Edmondson Blog


Useful phases if you are reintarnated (reborn as a hillbilly):
  • You plant a tater, you get a tater.
  • Never try to teach a pig it dance. You'll waste your time and just annoy the pig.
  • Never get into a wrestlin' match with a pig. You're both goin' to get muddy, and the chances are the pig likes it.
  • Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get by without it.
  • Go for ugly early and you'll never go home alone.
  • If I was any better, I'd be twins.
  • About as sexy as socks on a billy goat.
  • I'm busier than a borrowed mule.
  • He looks like three pounds of ugly in a two pound sack.
  • He's so stupid he thinks Johnny Cash is a pay-toilet.
  • He's so stupid he couldn't pour piss out of a boot even if the instructions was written on the heal.
  • I ain't as good as I once was, but I'm better once than I ever was.
  • I feel like I was shot at and missed, and shit at and hit.
  • That's like wiping before you poop - it don't make sense.
  • I got a bad case of the zacklies: my mouth tastes zackly like my but smells.
  • That piano player's fingers are slipperier than sausages on a griddle.

0 Responses to “Reintarnation”

Post a Comment

© 2007 The Edmondson Blog